Jeff and I are a clergy couple. We've been doing this for 4 years so far, all in the same church in rural America. We share one full-time position, and we co-parent. It sounds neat and tidy, but it really isn't. Many days feel chaotic, draining, and crazy. Many of the struggles we face are common to first-time pastors, many are common to pastors with young kids at home, and many are unique to clergy couples.. For our first blog post, we wanted to share with you the Top 12 indicators that you are, in fact, a clergy couple.
1. If you go into the office to play through worship songs, only to find that your lovely spouse has the list of songs at home. Of course, you only discover this after digging through the piles on your shared desk for an hour.
2. If your kids say they want to go to pastor school so they can work at church too and see Mommy/Daddy.
3. If you sit at the dinner table struggling to come up with something to talk about that didn't happen at church that day.
4. If nearly every "inside joke" revolves around movements of the liturgical service, theological arguments, or a witty remark a seminary professor made years ago.
5. If you have more student loans between the two of you than you'll ever have the money to pay off.
6. If you have one, full-time income, but find yourself needing child care all the time.
7. If you have to try to focus on a meeting after the church service while also watching your kids write on the attendance pads with permanent marker.
8. If you come home hoping to make a pot of coffee only to discover that the coffee has been brewed already (and is almost gone).
9. If you both get extra stressed out around Christmas-time.
10. If you have the opportunity both to use your gifts for ministry AND be able to experience special moments with your children.
11. If suddenly you realize that the church not having a nursery is going to be a problem once your child begins crawling, walking, talking, or becomes otherwise difficult to keep in one place.
12. If you actually get to listen to a sermon in your church given by someone other than you once in a while!
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